Sometimes God makes us do U-turns in our lives. I remember seeing a bumper sticker years ago that said, "If you're going the wrong way, God allows U-turns." Although I don't think I was going the wrong way, I do think God has led me on a U-turn today.
Two weeks ago, my husband and I made a decision together that I would take a leave of absence from my job and stay at home to take care of our daughter. He said financially we could make it. Well, yesterday, after going over our expense list for the umpteenth time, he came to me and said that we weren't going to make it. I have to tell you, this is not what I wanted to hear. And after many, many hours of tears and a very sleepless night, I woke up this morning knowing what I had to do. So I got on the phone and grovelled for my job back. It was humiliating, to say the least, but it is what God asked me to do, and so I had to put my pride up on the shelf and do it.
I'm still not sure what the Lord is doing, but I do know that He is in control. He is still my pilot, and I cling to that fact when I think about all of the other things that still need to fall in place. We still don't have childcare for my daughter. My job-share partner still needs to okay the whole situation. My district still needs to permit me to come back. There are a lot of "stills", but I trust that the Lord is "still" omniscient and "still" all-powerful.
2 comments:
I don't know what to say but that I love you and am praying for each one of you. I know that God is big and he cares about us so deeply. He has a great big plan for your family and I am sure things will work out for the best in the end!
Sometimes we think that God is done with a situation when He isn't finished yet...all the while pulling us closer to Him! We are in a very similar situation. I am also looking desperatly for loving childcare for Presley, I'm praying for you!
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